Losing Keys

“I’ve been losing lots of keys lately, I don’t know what that means... But maybe I’ve been better off with things that can’t be locked at all”

I love music, and of course as a lover of words, the lyrics stimulate me. These lyrics by Jack Johnson hit a place inside me.

It's common for people to carry around keys for all the locks in their lives; doors, drawers, vehicles, cabinets and boxes. Sometimes I muse about how metaphorical these keys can be.

About a month ago, I lost my car keys – I am still waiting for them to turn up.

It’s odd … recently I had someone tell me they thought I just wasn’t comfortable living in the “tension” between two different states of being. Strangely, I see myself as a person who lives quite comfortably in the tension. Whether it was the three years of living in the unresolved state of my father’s murder and residue of his life … or the 40+ years of unresolved dilemma of my mother’s anorexia … or the six years of the unresolved state of a marriage that never was one … or the eight years of being misunderstood by some of the people who were supposed to be the closest to me in Christ. In the voids Christ was amplified. Him revealing more of Himself to me in and through each of these states of “unresolved tension” has given me joy that has nothing to do with my circumstances or even the people God has wandering next to me.

I guess I will just wait to see what the Holy One in me reveals about this idea of where I am at with “living in the tension” … keeping my eyes open for Him.

When I think about my missing keys, I just smile and think … ah, they’ll turn up if God wants them to. Hope they unlock something profound.